Guess it’s departure day … Our human is stressed out and tries to remember a thousand things. Kajsa is already hiding under the sofa, but I take advantage of the situation. I’m an opportunist and I know that our human is way too distracted to pay attention to me.
So while my human is packing, I’m unpacking her bag. I’m sure these treats want to travel in my stomach to Finland!
Talking of gifts: we didn’t get anything for Christmas!
Our human says that
a) we’ve not been good girls
b) we’re only cats – she doesn’t even give Christmas presents to humans.
c) that she didn’t get anything for Christmas either (see b)
“Only cats” , “not good girls” … How dare she? And her lies continue: she didn’t get any Christmas presents*, BUT she stole Granny’s gift!
Yesterday we showed that Granny got some expensive high-tech recorder / hard drive for her tv. And guess who’s playing with it now? Right. Our human. She stole her own mother’s Christmas gift!
She says that she’s installing, updating and explaining the device for her mother. She thinks she’s unselfish, and that her mother is grateful for her help. Bah. We know that humans love pressing buttons and playing with anything that has a screen, so she can’t fool us. She’s a thief!
* Note to L.: she loved your homemade candy! We cats don’t consider it a gift though because we got treats, too, and that’s something we should get all day every day.
Jej!!! Granny was kind enough to share her belated Christmas present with me!
Granny got to keep some high-tech machine, but I claimed this wonderful foil. I’m normally not a playful cat, but this very material is the most wonderful toy I ever had!
Oh, and don’t worry, my human knows that plastic is dangerous. I’m only allowed to play under supervision, but that’s actually even more fun – she hides wand toys under the foil and I’m eagerly playing like a crazy kitten.
Jeeeeeez. You’re disturbing my carefully scheduled afternoon nap! Some of you may remember that I’m acat who can calculate the sun path. So please don’t disturb my busy sun-bath schedule. We’ll soon travel back to Finland, so I’ve to enjoy the last days of continental day length.
P.S. The windows are dirty. When do you attempt to clean them? Can’t really see that you’re keeping up with common service standards.
Uh-oh. I better keep a low profile today and look as cute as possible. My human is FURious about an ever so tiny furry incident.
My human was surprised to find a hairball on the floor this morning: I always barf on rugs, sofas, beds or any other delicate material, but this hairball was next to a rug. Shouldn’t she just be happy? And even more important, shouldn’t other persons in this household stay out of this? No – of course Grandpa had to intervene.
Something strange happened tonight. When I went to the bathroom, I stepped into something juicy on a rug. Couldn’t really identify what it was, looked like poo, but smelled differently? I got it off my feet but couldn’t find it afterwards. I didn’t want to turn on the light because I was afraid to wake you up.
I couldn’t find anything when I got up this morning – was this just a dream?
Is it my fault that I have so much fur? Is it my fault that Grandpa is too stupid to walk around a hairball? Of course not! So why am I to blame ?!?
Someone told me
It’s all happening at the zoo
I do believe it
I do believe it’s true
(Simon and Garfunkel)
The worst thing at Granny’s place are all ( ~one~ editor’s note) the closed doors. Grandpa has his own Gentlemen Room. Our human says this is only fair after we kicked Grandpa out of the bedroom. Bah. She conveniently neglects that all rooms belong to cats by law.
You would think a glass door gave us at least some control over Mystery Room. Admittedly, the door saves our lives as we’re not dying of curiosity, but it also works against us. We often lurk in front of Grandpa’s room, ready to run for our lives as soon as the door opens. Humans are typically way too slow for agile and talented cats like us, but the glass door infringes any surprise attacks – Grandpa knows exactly where we are when he opens the door. Bah.
Granny’s green armchair is also this year a hot spot. While Tessa feels a need to sleep in an indecent yoga position, I remain true to myself and keep up the art of Conservative Cuteness. Some of you may remember that I hardly ever show my belly, but prefer being cute with dignity.
In hindsight, we should have known that something “doggy” was going to happen. Our human normally orders our food and litter online and the latest shipment arrived 2 days prior to our departure. We were very curious when this box showed up among all cat items – a “Super Box” for dogs?!
We weren’t allowed to touch it because it was “for somebody else”. However, Tessa somehow managed to get her teeth on it, hehe.
She didn’t only destroy the box, but got hold of some very interesting pouches with dog treats.
Hehehehehehehe. We sure taught Intruder Dog a lesson – the lamb sticks were gone before he arrived. And also our human got her share: she had to clean a rug on our departure day because we ate far too much lamb. Well, that serves her right, how dare she give our great manor house to a dog?!
We found a very disturbing video on our human’s phone. This is OUR castle, what is this dog doing there ?!? He looks way too confident and satisfied with himself.
Strangely enough, our human doesn’t see any point in calling the police. Does this mean that she approves the intruder dog? OUTRAGEOUS! When the cats are away, the dog will play ? We’re plotting revenge for our return – any good ideas?