K as in Kajsa. Love at second sight
I’m embarrassed about this post. I thought about editing some parts, but I want to be authentic on this blog.
I fell in love with Tessa at first sight. She was so cute and made it easy for me. She let me pet her and showed that she liked me. Kajsa was hiding. She continued being shy for some days, but she eventually warmed up. I had nothing against Kajsa, but it was Tessa I adored. Kajsa felt more like an “attachment”. Wow, this sounds cruel. I made sure that Kajsa accepted me, because I wanted her to feel comfortable at my place. However, it didn’t immediately feel like the perfect match, but rather like another wonderful cat that comes along with Tessa. I love both now. Kajsa and I just needed a bit more time.
It’s kind of funny; things didn’t turn out the way I anticipated. I thought that Tessa would be more of a pussy cat, whilst Kajsa would prefer doing her own things. At the moment, it’s the other way around. Kajsa is crazy about me. If I let her, she’d lick me all the time and purr whilst I pet her. Remember the rash on my hands? That was Kajsa’s fault. My hands are getting more and more used to her tongue, and I hope it’ll continue that way. I really enjoy when Kajsa is treating me. I need to teach her to do that on my back, it’d be a great massage. Is this gross? Probably. It doesn’t feel that way though, I like how we “pet each other”. It’s strange – I also like dogs, but I hate it when dogs are licking me.
However, Kajsa is sometimes really challenging. She wants to be with me most of the time, and she’s jealous when Tessa gets my attention. Kajsa hisses at her and hit her. I’ve difficulties handling this situation. Tessa usually goes away when Kajsa hits her.
My instinct tells me to accept their power relation. I’ve also talked with the staff about Kajsa’s behavior, and they advised me to accept Kajsa’s power. However, I should make sure to keep it within bounds. Tessa should also be able to be with me, eat and use the litter box. The latter ones aren’t an issue, and Kajsa doesn’t push Tessa all the time away. It normally happens once per visit (about 45 minutes). The staff explained it may be harmful if I continue playing with Tessa after she has gone away. My behavior could disturb the relationship between the girls. I get that. However, it’s sad to see when Tessa is dominated by Kajsa. I usually don’t play with Kajsa afterwards, because I don’t want to encourage her behavior. Is neither following Tessa nor paying attention to Kajsa a good solution?
Funny enough, it’s sometimes also what Kajsa wants. A typical situation: Kajsa stays on the upper shelf, whilst I’m sitting on the flour playing with Tessa. Kajsa comes down, makes Tessa go away, and jumps back to the upper shelf. ??? What’s the point?? The result is that all three of us are sitting in our own corner and don’t look at each other. Sigh.
It’s also important to Kajsa that Tessa doesn’t bound with any other cat. The shelter opens always one cage, and takes turns at which cats are allowed to walk around. This cat is sometimes sitting in front of my cats’ cage. Tessa is usually curious and wants to interact. Kajsa is literally becoming a dog. She looks like a dog and she even growls when another cat dares to look at Tessa.
Eh, writing about Kajsa’s behavior makes me suddenly think that she’s maybe not jealous that I’m spending time with Tessa, but Tessa with me? In other words: I thought she’s angry that I give so much attention to Tessa. It could be the other way around though: Tessa is including other ‘persons’ than Kajsa in her life, whilst Kajsa wants to remain the only one. That would also explain why she often goes back to her shelf after she hissed at Tessa.
Uff. For a mess. I need to learn more about cats. However, chances are good that these situations will improve when they’re living at my place. There’s much more space for them to go their own ways. Living together will also change the relationship between me and them. We only see each other for about 45 minutes 5 days a week now.
Tessa is the one who is crazy about playing, but sometimes Kajsa wants to play as well.
Ok, this is Kajsa’s post, but Tessa was using her time well. Kajsa was laying on the shelf and we cuddled. Since I’m always a bit afraid of excluding Tessa, I thought it’d be a great idea to play with Tessa at the same time. I had a string toy in my hand, and I heard that she was moving. I didn’t feel any pressure on the toy though. I ignored my observation and continued petting Kajsa. Classical beginner mistake: don’t rely on that your cat is doing what you think she’s doing. When I turned my attention to Tessa, I realized that she had opened my shoelaces. Apparently, the shoelaces were more interesting than the string toy.
April 13, 2015 @ 14:37
They both sound sweet in their own unique ways. I am sure that once they are home, things will change. Right now, they are caged most of the time and only see you for a brief amount of time. When they have you to themselves 24/7, they will work out a schedule. I forgot to tell you I gave you 2 awards the other day- I am getting dippy in my old age, I should have told you this a few days ago. Sorry about that.
April 16, 2015 @ 18:19
Woohoo! An award?? ME? How could I’ve missed that?? I’m actually reading your blog, but I was apparently distracted on that day! THANK YOU for my very first award. I actually think it’s the first award of my life.
I hope you’re right, it’d been great if I didn’t have to deal with Kajsa’s jealousy on a daily basis.
April 13, 2015 @ 17:45
I think it’s funny that Kajsa is becoming a dog!
Good luck with the 2015 A to Z Challenge!
A to Z Co-Host S. L. Hennessy
http://pensuasion.blogspot.com
April 16, 2015 @ 18:21
Thank you! And yes, I’ll give her Dog as a second name! Thank you also for co-hosting the A to Z challenge, you all do a wonderful work!
April 13, 2015 @ 20:30
Think it’s normal.. 🙂 I love cats! Sounds like you have wonderful friendships with them.
http://sytiva.blogspot.com/
April 16, 2015 @ 18:24
Haha, help! But hierarchy is certainly normal to some extend, but so hard to bear! Thank you for coming over!
April 13, 2015 @ 20:34
when they are home you will need to be an advocate for Tessa to make sure she gets the attention she needs without fearing she will be punished by Kajsa. It happens when on cat wants to be dominate
April 16, 2015 @ 18:29
Huh huh. I wished I hadn’t had to deal with this, but there’s no way around. I’ll keep a close eye on Tessa’s situation after they’ve moved in. I somehow hope that things will calm down when they’re with me 24/7.
April 13, 2015 @ 23:58
We’re sure that once you get Tessa and Kajsa home, you will work it out as to play time, attention time. And yep, we find shoelaces more fun than string toys. 😉
April 16, 2015 @ 19:15
Sigh. Shoelaces and cats. Bags and cats. Boxes and cats. Anything I forgot? I’m sure there’s more. I was actually happy that Tessa did play with my shoelaces instead of the string toy. She’s been a bit shy during the last days, so it’s great that she dared to come so close!
Looking forward to having them here, and I really hope that we’ll all get our equal part.
April 14, 2015 @ 01:59
We have 4 cats. I speak dog but my hubby speaks cat. They feel safe up high because they can view everything. Gives them more confidence. My hubby makes sure to give attention to all of them. Sometimes our Diva cat (Lucy) dislikes it when my hubby pays attention to another cat but he just tells Lucy to go away and she does…in a huff…but she does. I will ask my hubby more because he really knows about them
April 16, 2015 @ 19:26
Thank you for your input! I’d be really interested if your husband has some special techniques in handling dominant behavior! I understand that the shelter recommends to respect the cats’ hierarchy, but I also need to ensure that both are getting enough attention.
April 14, 2015 @ 03:18
Hello there.
I used to live with 4 cats. Even though they all came from the same mum, but different litters, they all had such different personalities. I liked to think I was the owner, but really, they own you. They are so fickle, you never know what you’re going to get one day to the next…one day they love you, the next they hate you, one day they love their food, the next day they can’t stand it! Then, they’ll disappear for days at a time never caring how much stress you’re under not knowing where they are and when they do turn up, they have this look of “Did you miss me?” I wish I still had cats. Hope all turns out well. Your photos are cute too.
Thanks for sharing.
Entrepreneurial Goddess
April 16, 2015 @ 19:28
Oh, sad to read that you don’t have cats anymore! Is there a specific reason for that?
I’ve to agree with you, they own you, not the other way around. I technically don’t even “own” them, because they’re still at the shelter, but they’re already dominating my life.
April 14, 2015 @ 05:24
Oft wandelt sich ja nochmal alles komplett, wenn Katzen so richtig im neuen Zuhause “angekommen” sind – ich bin gespannt, welche spannenden Charakterzüge du da noch bei deinen Miezen entdecken wirst. Vermutlich werden sie dich ganz schön überraschen 😉
April 16, 2015 @ 19:29
Da spreche ich mal lieber nicht gegen an! Jedes Mal, wenn ich bei ihnen bin, lerne ich etwas neues über sie hinzu, und ich kann mir gut vorstellen, dass sich das nochmal ändern wird, wenn sie nicht mehr in einem Käfig leben.